LiveStrong Day

Today is LIVESTRONG day in the United States, the 10th anniversary of Lance Armstrong's cancer diagnosis. I know this because a blogger friend of my sister is asking people to tell their stories of how cancer has affected their lives. This is an on-line event and POD will be doing a give away, so check out her blog at:

http://janell-sufferingsuccotash.blogspot.com/


Cancer has touched almost everyone I know. My mom, several of her sisters a couple of dad's brothers. Two very good friends have had to say good bye to their children because of cancer. And that is wrong on so many levels, parents are not supposed to outlive their kids.

Oh and it has touched me too. I was diagnosed in 2006 with breast cancer. Just the month before my best friend had told me that her husband had colon cancer - so advanced that he had about three months to live. How do you tell your best friend you have cancer and it scares the crap out of you and you need a shoulder to lean on, when that shoulder is already overloaded with a much worse case?

You don't...you call your sister long distance and bawl over the phone. Get all that out of your system, then the next day you go over and tell your friend when you are calm and under control.

If it weren't for my sister, I think I would have had a much worse time than I did. And I would still be wearing the bandage they stuck under my arm when they took out the lymph nodes :)

I love ya Bag Lady!

Cancer has also touched many of the bloggers I have met over the years and to them I say: Hold onto your humour, chemo brain can be blamed for all sorts of things. This is just one more step in life and you will win.

Have a good day all - and LIVESTRONG

P.S. WWC tomorrow for sure :)

Well, so much for that

I was composing a post in my head yesterday morning - never a good place for me to store much of anything. It started something like: woke up late, whine, whine, cold waiting for the bus, whine, whine.

Then, while I was on the bus, I was reading posts on my phone and read about fellow blogger Travis Erwin's tragedy on Sunday. It puts things into perspective. It didn't relieve me of the cranky mood I woke up in, but, it did remind me that my troubles are not all that large.

Of course, later when I got home and was reading more blogs (my battery died) I find out my sister has been sick for days! (and yes, after I typed that, I got up and put my phone on the charger)

So much for whining yesterday!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today is a new day :)

So this month is the month for all the tests to make sure I am still in the land of the living and cancer free. I have to make an appointment to get my blood drawn and my tatas squished. I have to make an appointment to get a pretty new sleeve for my arm, to keep the swelling down.
I also get to go and have the worst test done - the one where they shove a camera up your colon.

That was part of why I was cranky yesterday. I had the appointment for my physical. The Dr's office, when they phoned to give me the appointment, told me 09.00. I bust my butt to get there, only to have the girl at the front desk tell me the appt is for 09.20 - wtf! Then she hands me a sheaf of papers and asks me to fill them out. It is a medical history form! Hello? I've been coming to this office for 5 years! What is the purpose of this?

As I said, I was cranky, so I underlined all of the typos and spelling mistakes and erroneous words. They want me to "enlist" all of the drugs I am on... in what? the Navy? After I did this I realized that my Dr. (who is German) may have been the one that wrote up the form, but still, his staff should have caught it!

So, I asked my Dr what was the purpose of the form..."well, you may have had a surgery, or seen another Dr and been put on a prescription that isn't in our files"... and if I hadn't told you about them, then I would be a complete idiot, thank you!

So, I need to make phone calls and set up more appts today. I will make a post at the end of the month and let you all know how things are going. Well, before then if I hear anything.

I'll post about other stuff in the meantime. I'm going to try to post more often. But, then again the road to hell - you know.

Have a good day all!

Hormones revisited

Not a long post today, but, I just had a reply to my "Pregnancy Hormones" post, opinion from the other side! That is the one about the diet where you get yourself injected with other hormones from a pregnant woman.

This is it: (I do agree with the first line)

Anonymous said...

All the processed food we've eaten since the fifties, and the chemicals therein have destroyed our hypothalamus. This procedure allows the hypothalamus o be reset. Everyone I have met who has done this is stronger, healthier and happier. They eat whatever they want, no more binging, dieting or weight fluctuations.

Maybe if you weren't so hung up on the (potential) boob factor you would take the time to really investigate the subject. Good thing you're not running a country! J

This person obviously has done the "diet" and was successful. It is also obvious that they have not read any of my other posts. Really, hung up on my boobs? If I were, I would be having reconstructive surgery or alternatively would never go anywhere without a bra that has a shaper in one side. (I can't be bothered to btw)

So, to brave "Anonymous J" (if she/he ever pops back in): I have had hormone positive breast cancer and lots of women get breast cancer while pregnant - Hello?

Oh and I am a woman, therefore too busy to run a country. ;)

****************

So, I am off to see my physiotherapist today to see about a new sleeve for my arm. I will post later and let you know if I am wrapped up like a mummy again.

Have a good day!

PS. according to my sitemeter, anon J was on for 0 seconds! Yeah, even a speed reader takes at least a couple to read the entire post!


Update: My arm is good - smaller than it was, so I don't need to be wrapped yippee! Now I just have to order a new sleeve. Of course, I had to wait so long for the therapist, I forgot to get my prescription, so I will have to go back tomorrow - might ride my bike if it is nice now that I have refreshed my memory of the route and actually looked at where the bike trail is in relation to all the construction.

Putting my money where my mouth is

The other day, I was writing about a Flickr group I had found called Memento Mori and was asked if I had put my photos up in the group. Well, I hadn't, so I have now put them on my Flickr site, if you are not squeamish about scars, fresh ones with a bit of blood through the steri-stitches, go ahead and have a look (click on cancer on the right).

I did discover that there is a group (or two, or 583) for cancer and I may put these there rather and let the first group think they are reminding themselves of their mortality.

I will warn you that these are not good photos, all I had was a very old web-cam, so they are a bit grainy and not very clear. I will also warn you that I have marked them as "moderate" for content, as you may catch sight of a nipple in one or two shots.

If any of you have not read my cancer journey and would like to, you are welcome to read it: here, here, here and here.

There are many Groups on Flickr for Cancer, just type cancer in the search box and they will come up.

Thanks.

Experiment

As some of you know, I am a breast cancer survivor. During the treatment, I took pictures of my lack of hair and the sparse growth and so on, with my really crappy web cam. (It has since gone to a very nice home at the eco-centre.) However, I have been playing with the pictures and since I got a proper camera have taken a photo of myself. This is rare, because I do not like to take pictures of myself, but as part of the learning about the camera, it had to be done. Besides, an Aunt wants a recent picture.

Then lo and behold, my sister The Bag Lady got tagged the other day to do a meme whereby "you describe your life with 6 words, or a photo or cartoon, then tag 6 other people". Well, she didn't tag anyone, she left it open and I thought, well, maybe I should put this composition out for people to have a look at. It only describes the most recent period of my life, but there it is.



So, there I am, from bald to now! Like Sis, I will not tag anyone, but if you feel like playing go right ahead.

Good afternoon.

Testing, testing

I went and had my mammogram and a bone density test done today. This is the first such test since having completed all of my treatments and I was a bit anxious.

That may be understating things. I have been having trouble sleeping for the last couple of nights. Now as this is a fairly regular thing anyway, I didn't really pay it much attention. I knew I would be a bit tense and just accepted that I would be short of sleep.

I woke up this morning at 7.00, for me this is early! Especially as I was still awake at 3.30! I thought, well, my appointment is not until 15.00, so lets see if I can sleep some more. I woke up at 10.00, I thought about getting up, but before I could turn thought into action, I fell asleep again.

I had a phone call at about 12.30 - I even answered it. Then I just lay there thinking how much I didn't want to get up! That would mean getting showered and dressed and catching the bus and getting my boobs squashed!

I didn't want to do any of those things. I wanted to live in blissful ignorance for a few more hours. It is a very pleasant place, I have it all decorated in a 1920's Art Deco theme, with handsome debonair men to cater to my every whim. Chocolate doesn't have any calories and Champagne flows freely.

Oh well, back to reality. I did finally haul my butt out of bed and shower etc. I transferred to the bus the route generator on my computer told me to, then freaked for a few minutes when it when in the opposite direction than the one I knew I had to go in. I sat and thought about bus numbers and calmed down when I realised I was on the correct bus, but for a minute there I thought I was going to wind up far away from where I needed to be.

So, I get off the bus and am walking along the front of the strip mall that the clinic is in, killing a minute or two, when I see a woman with a bag with all sorts of paper work in it. It was only then that I realised I had left my paperwork at home! I went into the clinic and explained what I had done and they just asked me to call the Dr.'s office and have them fax it over. Well, if you have read any of my other posts, you may remember that I have pointed out before that my Dr.'s office staff are not the brightest bulbs in the box. I had to explain twice what I wanted and then she had me hold to see if they could do that! Well she finally said that she could, so I went back in and filled out the forms that they gave me.

I was measured & weighed again. I haven't lost nor have I gained weight since October at the Dr.'s office, but I am now almost an inch shorter! 5"6" and a bit! I have no idea what is going on there, but I am sure we couldn't have been that far off at home when I measured out at 5'8 3/4" at 16 or so years old. Maybe it has something to do with being measured by someone shorter than I am?

So, I had the bone scan first, I won't know anything about that until the Dr. calls me, then I went in and had the mammogram. They took four slides of each breast and sent me out to wait. The first two on each side are regular slides and the next two are magnified, I don't remember them magnifying the last time I was there, but procedures change. They called me back in to take more shots of my left breast (yes, the one that didn't have cancer) because they could see little specks and wanted a better look at them. The nurse said they were calcium deposits and they were on the last films, but they want a better look. I was sent out to wait again.

The nurse came and took me back to where I could get dressed and told me that they want to do an ultra-sound and core biopsy - just to make sure of what these are - and she would set up an appointment for me while I got dressed.

So, I really have nothing to report, no good news or bad news right now. I sure took a long time getting there though didn't I? I have the appointment on Monday to find out what these are, until then, I just have to wait. Hey, I might wind up with my boobs the same size again after all!

Good evening all.

Secondary Lymphoedema

This will be the final installment in my saga of Breast Cancer. For any of you that missed the beginning of my story, you can check out the first post about Chemo here and the second post about Radiation here. This post is about how I discovered the cancer and the surgeries.

So, Secondary Lymphoedema, is the result of having Lymph Nodes removed from my right armpit in order to see if my type of breast cancer had spread to the lymphatic system. I was very lucky in that it hadn't, all of the nodes they removed were clean. That is what makes the lymphoedema so very frustrating. It turns out not to have been a necessary surgery and I will have to put up with this probably all of my life! I could be lucky and it will correct itself over time, some women who have had the surgery never experience the swelling that I am about to describe to you.

First off, here is the link to the Wikipedia description. They have other links there as well and a link to the blog of a woman suffering from primary lymphoedema which is very informative.

Without getting too technical, the lymph system is a circulatory system, much like how your blood flows through your body. It's job is to filter & carry away toxins and crap in your body. With the removal of some of the nodes, my bodies ability to remove this fluid has been compromised which results in the fluid accumulating in the arm.

The resulting swelling is painful to say the least. In order to get rid of the swelling, I had to visit the physio therapist at the cancer clinic daily to have my arm wrapped in compression bandages. They start the wrap with a cotton/spandex sleeve, the wrap the fingers and hand with gauze. Over this they wrap up the length of your arm a thin 4" wide piece of foam. Now, if you aren't hot enough already, they then start from the hand and wrap 4 tensor bandages, in a figure 8 pattern all the way up your arm. In my case, they had to add a cushion over the nerves at the base of the thumb and an extra cotton padding at the crease of the elbow. This is what the end result looks like. (Sorry for the quality, click to get rid of the background.)

Close up of the hand

Monday through Friday, I had to get my arm wrapped, then walk over to the radiation department and try to get my clothes off and then tie one of those designer gowns they give you. With a newly wrapped arm, you can't bend your elbow! I eventually gave up trying to tie it, I figured that everyone there was there for some treatment or moral support for a family member and that seeing my back bare (I was able to keep pants on), was not going to shock or upset anyone.

Weekends, I was to keep Fridays wrap on as long as I could which meant that I had to shower with the wrap on. They gave me a plastic glove that goes all the way to the shoulder. Now those of you that know anything about farm animals or watch TV or movies where this glove may have been used as comic relief, know what type of glove I am referring to. So, being the smart-alec that I am, I asked the girl that was wrapping me, if they get the gloves from a Veterinary supply house? She looked at me kind of funny, then the penny dropped and she laughed. She was a farmers daughter, she knew that this was the type of glove used for pulling calves or turning them in the womb or other things I don't want to think about that would have to do with the insides of large animals. When I needed more gloves, one day, I had the therapist (not the assistant) wrapping me, but, I asked for more "vet gloves". She had no idea what I was talking about! After I stopped laughing, I explained to her what they were for, she said she didn't think they came from a vet supply house. No sense of humour that one.

Wrapping the arm and forcing the fluid out has a few side effects. One of which is that the fluid has to go somewhere and the closest place is the lungs. This is not a good thing when you have asthma not to mention the awful habit of smoking. I am working on that I swear! The weird experience I had, was when it went to my head! For two days, I am not sure if it was because I was so tired or what, but I must not have moved all night and when I got up, I staggered like a drunken sailor. It affected my balance for a few minutes each morning, I was even listing on the loo. Not to mention walking sideways, and each step getting faster trying to stop moving in the direction of the wall! Very funny in retrospect, but not so funny at the time.

Of course, by this time, the season had changed and it was full on winter. Here I am running around in a tank top just so my arm could be wrapped easily! Um and because I didn't have any long sleeved shirts that would go over the wrapping. I was very thankful that I had lost a bit of weight and that the sleeve on my winter coat was wide enough to accommodate my arm, even if I couldn't get my hand out of the cuff. I carry my wallet in my front right hand pocket, that made for some interesting times, I would put wallet in pocket before I got wrapped, then go shopping in the afternoon if I needed anything. Yes, I am a slow learner! ;)

My right arm was toasty warm, the rest of me was freezing while I was waiting for buses! I didn't have a crappy old sweater that I could cut the arm off of to keep the rest of me warm while wearing sleeveless tops, though I eventually remembered that I still had my leg warmers from the '80's. They lived in the trunk of my car for winter emergencies, in case you were wondering. They and a large scarf draped over my shoulders were the solution I needed to my dilemma. Well, that and two or three hats to keep my head warm.

Finally, they got the swelling down and somewhat stable about the same time my radiation ended and were able to order a custom fit sleeve and glove for me. These are compression garments and the idea is to prevent the arm from swelling more than it is already. They last about six months and then you need a new one. Silly me, I phoned at 5 months to make an appointment to be checked, only to be told that my therapist wasn't available for the next three months! By the time I got in to see her, I had thought things were under control and so had done some silly things like washing walls and moving furniture, cleaning places that hadn't been cleaned for awhile, because I had been sick. This was not a good idea. I over did it and my arm blew up just before my appointment! It had 3 cups of fluid more than my left arm! So, I had to go through the wrapping procedure again before I could order the new sleeve. As soon as I got home, I made a point of writing on my calendar, at four months, to call and make an appointment!

They gave me a bunch of exercises and massage techniques to use to keep the lymph fluid moving the right direction. They have recommended a low protein diet as well as lowering my sodium intake. What they didn't mention is how to get back to being able to carry any weight. I have been doing the exercises and massage and watching my food intake, but every time, I carry something the least bit heavy, I can see my arm swell. I can see my arm swell if I have to write a lot by hand. This is the frustrating part of having lymphoedema! I have to find the right balance of exercise and diet that will make it go away and stay away. Losing weight would be a bonus if it happened!

So, now I am on maintenance, trying to keep the arm from blowing up like a puffer fish. I have a mammogram scheduled for Friday (that took three months to get an appointment), so I will post my results when I get them. They will of course be clean - right?

Good Evening all.

Radiation Tan - Not the look I was going for!

Following my chemo, I was sent for radiation. They really wanted to make sure I was done with the cancer and make sure I wasn't going to get it again. So,here is how it goes.

Just before my 5th chemo treatment (out of 6), I was sent for a consult with the radiation specialist. This is where he outlined what was going to happen and the possible dangers attached to radiation. A few that stand out: it will make my bones fragile and I could break a rib just by coughing; it could also give me lung cancer; heart problems, but those are more common when breast cancer is on the left; and of course I could wind up with the ever popular frozen shoulder. Having been through the frozen shoulder twice (once for each shoulder) I was really determined to not have that happen again - particularly as my right shoulder still didn't have full mobility!

Alright, so now he has scared me enough that I am beginning to have second thoughts about this whole treatment course. Of course, I managed to wise up and use my little brain and realized that he was giving me the worst case scenario. Then I went through the whole, yes, well, the last several years of my life have been worst case scenarios - if it weren't for bad luck I wouldn't have any luck at all! Then I figured, well, what's the worst that could happen? I could die? I am not afraid of dying, I have no kids, I have done a lot, I could do more, but, if it is my time, so be it. Besides I felt that somehow, my luck was due to change.

The next step, was to tattoo marks on my torso so that they could position me exactly the same every time. Three little dots, very boring for a first tattoo! They ran me through the machine to make sure I wouldn't get stuck or panic or something. No, really it was to figure out the positioning needed and trajectories and other technical stuff, so that they put the radiation where it was needed.

I was then (finally) sent off to Physio Therapy. (I say finally, because I had started to have signs of Lymphoedema which will be another post.) Then I had my last chemo treatment and a wait of 5 weeks before they would start the radiation.

The wait is so that your blood has had a chance to recover from the chemo before they start bombarding you with radiation. Treatments for the radiation were every day Monday through Friday for 5 weeks, 25 in total. During this time, I was also being wrapped for the lymphoedema every day as well.

The treatments themselves are easy, you take longer to change out of your street clothes into a gown and getting settled in the exact position than the actual treatment. Then of course, getting dressed again.

For breast cancer, you lay on your back with your arms over your head, holding on to little handles. Then the techs shift you around until they think you are in the right spot (and boy, did they get a workout shifting me). They then leave the room and the machine whirs and clicks, then it moves to the second position and whirs and clicks some more and you are done. The staff comes in to move the bed and help you get your fat body upright and you leave. Only once did they have to add a couple of seconds to the treatment and that is really all it was, they moved the machine back to the first position and dosed me again. It had been too short the first time.

I mentioned earlier that my right shoulder was still not completely mobile. Well, this position is the least comfortable position for an arm that has restricted nerves and blood flow. I had to use my left hand to pull my right arm from over my head.


My skin is very, very fair - pasty you might say. So, I now have a perm-a-tan over my breast. Yes, just the one and under my arm too. In fact it is darker under my arm. As that area so rarely ever sees the light of day, it tanned first and of course went to burn first and peeled first. Of course, being winter, it looked like the negative of a picture of someone that had been in a bikini for the summer.


The staff told me to shower everyday, but avoid soaping the area that was being toasted and of course don't wash off the marks around my tattoos. I was to then put cornstarch on the felt marker so that it would not rub away. They renewed the felt marks everyday, so I put cornstarch into an empty spice jar and would shake some out onto the marks before I got dressed. However, I hadn't rinsed the bottle well enough, so I spent the 5 weeks of radiation smelling like rosemary. Better than onion I suppose.


Once I started to peel (at about three weeks) they told me what kind of lotion to buy and I started to apply that daily as well. I was very lucky again, as I didn't get the oozing blisters that can happen with radiation. It was just a burn that then peeled and became a tan once all was over with. I was a bit tired during the treatment phase, but it wasn't until after I was done that the exhaustion caught up with me.


Fortunately for me, the Cross Cancer Institute has a volunteer driver program, as last year was the first time in forever that we had snow before Halloween and lots of it. This year, our snow has only just begun a couple of days ago. As an asthmatic, winter and walking do not mix, throw cancer treatments on top of that and well, lets just say, it was a wretched winter for me. Not to mention that I was cold, I couldn't seem to get enough hats and scarves to keep my head warm. Normally during winter, I can get by most days with just earmuffs, but this winter too I can't seem to keep my head warm in spite of having my hair back. Oh well, I guess I will just have hat hair all winter long!

Those are the only photos I have that show the tan and peeling without showing too much else.


Good evening.

Chemotherapy and the Cross

So, my first post on my Breast Cancer left off with me saying I would tell you about chemo in another post...here it is - finally.

The Cross Cancer Institute (CCI) is Northern Alberta's cancer hospital. You can get your chemo locally, but if you have to have radiation therapy you have to come to Edmonton. Needless to say, it is a busy place. When it first opened it was referred to as the W.W.Cross, after the man who started it. I am not sure when they started to refer to it as CCI & dropped the WW, but my first experience (many years ago for a friends son), it was the WW Cross and in my tiny mind, it still is. Especially as the college I went to was CCI. Change when you are this old, is hard!

Yes, I'm getting there.

To recap a bit though.

• May 15 Mammogram
• June 5 Lumpectomy & Sentinal Node Biopsy
• July 5 Axial node surgery (lymph nodes under right arm)

On July 24th, I went to the Cross for a New Patient Information session. This is where they tell you a bit about the place, show you around the various treatment areas and tell you about the other services available. The tour is run by volunteers. There are volunteers everywhere in the Cross, they come around offering drinks and cookies. They are there to escort patients when they don't know where they are going, they run the gift store and the bookstore and information centre.

July 26th, I had my first consult with my Dr. This is where I learned about the type of cancer I had and the treatment plan. I had hormone positive breast cancer, a 1.5 cm tumor was removed from the top of my right breast, they gave me a 2/3 grade rating on the severity. The sentinal node was 1+, 2.5mm, which is what determined they would take out the lymph nodes, but of the 6 nodes they took, none had any trace of cancer.

So, the plan was to be as aggressive as possible to try to make sure it doesn't come back. I was to get chemo, radiation and then have my estrogen killed. Six to nine months of treatments.

I had a muga the next day (some kind of imaging of the heart) to make sure I was fit enough to have all this abuse piled on me. Then I had appointments for classes on what to expect from chemo and what to expect after it started. I was given pamphlets and information sheets on dry mouth, eating right, soft foods, how to manage my energy and anything else they could think up. They do a very good job of making you feel comfortable there and making sure you have all the information you could possibly want.

The actual treatments didn't start until August 8th (mom's birthday), when I had my first blood test. The 9th was the first of six chemo treatments. My sister came with me for my treatments, the first one, the nurse told us all about what she was doing, that I could walk around if I felt like it, but that I couldn't leave the room. I couldn't leave the room, because if for any reason the toxic chemicals they were pumping into my veins spilled outside of the room, it would result in having to shut down the floor and evacuate and emergency services would have to come and its hazardous waste and the world as we know it would come to an end. Or something like that.

So, of course, both of us being a bit nervous (well, me anyway) and leery of the whole process, got a bit carried away and we are a sarcastic, witty pair at the best of times. But the nurse played right along with us. Talking about steel gates crashing down around us and lights & bells and action movie heroes. Well, anyway, we had a laugh. Then it got boring. It takes about four hours to pump all that crap into a body. We had each brought books and sis brought along a crossword puzzle book, which we managed to involve the woman in the bed next to mine. Four hours later, we were let go, so we went shopping. It was a bright sunny day. I now tan really easily in my face! Oops!

Well, the next day, I was okay, a bit tired, not a lot of nausea, but, didn't really eat a lot. I had to inject myself for seven days and take certain drugs at various times and durations around the chemo dates. It was about the third day after chemo, sis had gone home already, when the pain struck. Every muscle and joint in my body ached, I felt like I was 900 years old and it was an effort just to go to the bathroom. Thankfully, I had plenty of ready to eat food on hand. I love living alone, but, this is one time when it would have been nice to have had a husband. By day 5 I was in agony, then it got better, in total the body aches only lasted about 5 days. I was very lucky, I was not vomiting, I was able to eat, I didn't have much appetite, but, it could have been so much worse. I got fungal infections in my throat, so wound up with a very disgusting mouthwash. Other than that it was not a horrible experience.

before shave

I lost my hair after the first treatment, just a week or so before the second treatment. I went in to the Cross as they have volunteers in a hair salon and they shaved it off for me and lent me a wig. I had my (very bad) shave Aug 30th. Sis, eventually gave me a clean shave, but, I seem to no longer have the photo on my 'puter. Oh well, it felt much better, as the stubble that was left from the first shave, would poke through head scarves.

bad shave

Having had the lymph nodes removed, limited the chemo to one arm, so by the last appointment, the nurses were having a bit of trouble finding places to put the needle. One time, I bruised as soon as she put it in, so she had to move it, then I bruised from the rubber tourniquet!

Just one of many bruises

Sis managed to come down for three more treatments, then I took the bus until I could get on to the volunteer driver schedule. Usually she just dropped me off then went and did something else, it is really very boring to sit and watch someone with an IV in their arm. It is really very boring to be that someone. I am very glad that I am such an avid reader, I can't imagine what non readers do in situations like this. So, she did my wash and cleaned my apartment and did things for me that I just had no energy to do. After the treatment, we would go and shop or one time we went for a drive out to our grandparents homestead with some cousins. I'll post on that later too.

I will post later on the radiation treatments. As for the chemo, it was pretty much the same, six times, fine for a couple of days , achy for 5 or 6 days, then fine again. As I said, I was lucky.

Good Afternoon.

P.S. there is no proper website fro the Cross, but for those that are interested and like links, here is one for the Alberta Cancer Board, they have a link to the Cross's Patient Guide and how to get there & contact info etc. (all in pdf )

I had an idea....

about a blog topic. It completely escapes me right now! I guess I am going to have to keep a notebook with me to write down these ideas. That is what happens I guess when you get old.

So, I will tell you about the name of my blog site instead.

My cat is a Himalayan Lynx Seal Point. His name is Sibu, which is an East Indian name I picked off of a web site. I can't remember what it means (this was 7 or so years ago), but, I just liked the sound of it. Cats respond well to sibilants so we didn't even look at any other letters. The other "S" names were just too long, too complicated, too common or plain boring. Unfortunately I can't post a really good picture of him as all I have is a really old web cam. My scanner bit the dust a few years back, so I can't even upload any of the other photos I have of him. Oh woe is me. Oh well, you will have to trust me when I say that his eyes are in fact blue - just paler than normal I think. By the way, for those that may be in living in warmer climes, points on cats like Siamese and Himy's go darker when exposed to the cold. (not that he is ever out for long)




Pegasus is my favorite fantasy creature. I have several statues and pictures, but, I will refuse any that have a Unicorns horn stuck on them! There is no such thing as a Uni-Peg! My sister once pointed out that there was also no such thing as a Pegasus or a Unicorn! I don't know where she got that idea! Of course I still believe in Santa too! He has never let me down.



Power, I just threw that on the title. I would have gone crazy long ago were it not for my cat, although sometimes I am not sure that he isn't the one behind the wheel. So I suppose you could say I get my power from my cat and my belief in Pegasus. And the belief that I have beaten the cancer - it will not come back!

(Just for Leah)

That's it, that is how I came up with the name for my blog. I didn't put anywhere near this amount of thought into it. Maybe if I had put more thought into it I would have come up with something much more pithy - oh well, I like it.

By the way my favorite real animal is the Polar Bear, I have lots of those too.

Good evening.

My bout with cancer

May 15th, 2006, I went for a mammogram. I had a lump in my breast that I thought needed to be checked again. I say again because in April of the year prior to that I had had a benign fibrous tumor removed from my right breast. While checking the incision, I thought I had felt another lump and mentioned it to my surgeon. She found the lump and did a fine needle aspiration in her office. (By the way, I learned later, don't do this!) It came back negative. Rather than sending me for a mammogram, she had me go to the hospital, where she proceeded to do a blind (no ultrasound) core biopsy. (Again, don't do this!) Never in all my forty some years of having tests done have I had to call the Doctor to get results - I didn't hear anything, so assumed all was well.

So, as I said, I went for a mammogram about a year after this as it felt like the lump was bigger. My G.P. didn't tell the clinic that there was a lump, so I had to return that afternoon for the ultrasound core biopsy, which gave them time to get the results from my surgeons test a year prior. This is when I was told don't have a fine needle aspiration or a blind core biopsy. Well, the surgeon, had missed the lump and gotten scar tissue! But, I never got called!

Two weeks later, I get a message from my Dr.'s office to make an appointment to see him. I call and set one up for two days later. I get a message the next day asking if I could call about my appointment. I call and they ask if I could come in that day. Well, now I don't need to go in, I know what he is going to say.

I am right, I have breast cancer. He has set up an appointment for the following week with ... you got it in one, the same surgeon! So, I tell him the tale of discovering this lump and how I am not really happy with this surgeon (he has nothing on file from her!), but, he suggests if I can, she is the fastest way to deal with this! He will try to get me in elsewhere if I really want. Well, I am really not happy, but by the same token, I think, it may well have been benign last year anyway and then I would have ignored it this year.

So, I get home and my first thought is to call my best friend Emily - then - I think, I can't! Her husband is dying of cancer, the last thing she needs is me bawling on her shoulder! So, I call my sister ( she would have been first if it weren't for my being broke and the call being long distance) and bawl on her shoulder. I had done really well, right up until I had to say the words to someone else.

So, I had the surgery on my breast on June 5th. They took just the lump and a lymph node to test. The lymph node, upon close examination proved to have a trace of cancer, so, they went in and took lymph nodes from under my right arm on July 5th. My sister came down from G.P. to babysit me for both of the surgeries and then ran me about the city right after getting me out of hospital. These were both day surgeries, the first I was in for about 6 hours, the second they kept me for closer to 10 hours. Woohoo! Gotta love medical care these days!

I went through chemo and radiation, but, I will save those experiences for another post.

Good Morning.

Here I Am!

Hello all, this is my first real blog on a grown up site! I am so excited, I have no idea what to talk about, or even what I am doing! I expect this first blog to be fairly short, but, you never know what will happen.

Oh, already I am excited about how much better this is. I was blogging (just until I got used to the idea) over on windows live pages.....we will leave the past behind us. This is so much better!

So, what can I tell you, hmmmm, I had breast cancer last year, so, this year, I am trying to make improvements in my lifestyle. It is going to be a tough row to hoe, but, after chemo and radiation, maybe not that bad.

I have to: quit smoking; eat better; exercise more. That covers the physical - for my mental health, oh, who knows! I have to quit worrying; learn to relax and meditate; stop trying to be a perfectionist. And probably a million more things that I can't think of right now for both categories.

Well, that is a brief introduction to me. I won't be posting daily, I am far to lazy for that (oh, something else to work on), but, stop by once in awhile and see if I've said anything you feel strongly enough about to comment on.

Goodnight.